what’s gunking up my head

November 3, 2012 | 103 Comments

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Some things I’ve been thinking about.

On the interwebs:

My social media network is full of intelligent, progressive, lovely folk who challenge me to think, live and love differently, with their own words and the words of others. If you follow me on Twitter or on my Facebook page, none of these will be new to you, but let me tell you what I think made them worth sharing.

Sluts on Halloween” is a video by Jenna Marbles that talks about the society-nurtured reflex for women to hate women. This video isn’t for the faint of heart. Jenna doesn’t give a shit if we agree with her and she certainly doesn’t mince words. She addresses the “so what” of dressing like a “slut” on Halloween. Listen for this line, “No one’s hatin’ on you for bein’ a toothbrush.” Best.

21 Things to Stop Saying Unless You Hate Fat People” was a fantastic read. If you’ve spent any time on my blog or five minutes with me, you know I’m a member of the Fat Acceptance Club. What that means to me is that all body shapes and sizes deserve love, respect, dignity, celebration, autonomy, and bud-the-fuck-out-ness. It means fat doesn’t equal unhealthy and skinny doesn’t equal healthy. It means I won’t laugh at your fat jokes. It means I work hard to love my body just the way it is and celebrate all it does for me.

I love all her points, but number 19 SPEAKS to me:

Suggesting that a fat person do something or not do something in order to look less fat or more flattering.

  • Example: “I don’t think that’s the right style dress for you. Here, this cut would be more flattering to your shape,” or “This shape of glasses will work best with your round face.”
  • Example: “Someone her size shouldn’t be wearing THAT!”
  • Example: All clothing products that are advertised as “slimming”.

Whether or not a fat person should wear striped clothes, have a certain haircut, go out in a bikini, etc is entirely up to the fat person in question. “Flattering” is a system of control, trying to wedge us all into tiny boxes. Fuck flattering!

Fuck flattering is my new motto. I love it. I wish I could hug Issa, the author of this post.

And for all of my friends who cringe at the word feminist, this one’s for you.  Anne explains, with her usual charm and style, why Feminism is still important, why we’re not done, and why Humanism doesn’t cut it.

We need our own space to talk about what’s happening to women today; we need our own conversation about issues that are unique to us. We need feminism.

On my bookshelf:

Oh god. My mind is so clogged up I haven’t made time to read. I have a pile of books by my bed and they remind me of how foggy I feel. I recently bought “Broken Magic” by Eric Sipple, a pal from the Yeah Write community (which, Jade, I can’t thank you enough for introducing me to). I’m about ten pages in and loving it. He’s an inspiring dude.

Emma and I are almost done the first book in the Harry Potter series. That’s been pretty cool to share with her. It’s as far as I got on my own, so it will be fun to dive into the second one together.

What are you reading and loving?

On my blog:

Here are some things I think you should read if you haven’t:


Please join my Truthfully Facebook page.

Joining up with Yeah Write for BlogHer’s NaBloPoMo. I use the term “joining up” loosely, as I think I’ve only ever been successful once out of my five NaBloPoMo attempts. No guilt. Just fun.

Other loveable posts:

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