I will remember boobs

November 11, 2012 | 11 Comments

Steve grabbing Shannon's boob through her sweater

Since the beginning of our kissing career, my oily forehead combined with Steve’s glasses has proved hazardous. Steve stopped finding it cute after the first day. Now I go out of my way to grease his glasses, simply to annoy him. He plays up being uber annoyed and I giggle in victory.

I was putting laundry away (a pile of panties to be exact) when I heard Steve running toward the bedroom to take me down in a wrestling match. Sensing his intentions, I threw my pile of panties in his face (fulfilling fantasies in BULK) to buy myself enough time to assume Karate Kid position.

Breaking through my unperfected stance, he threw me on the bed, sat on me, pinned my arms, and attacked me with peck-like kisses. I maneuvered my head up and greased his left lens. He continued pecking, so I began to violently lunge my forehead at his right lens, in an effort to blind him completely. After a few missed attempts, I realized my efforts were in vain and knew I had to take more drastic measures.

“Look at my boobs!” I yelled. And he did. He released my arms, handed me his glasses and buried his face in my sistas. While he was down there, I took the opportunity to thoroughly massage my forehead grease into every inch of his glasses. When he came up for air, I handed them back. Without missing a beat, he screamed, “They’ve been deep fried!”

I peed myself.


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  • http://fiftyshadesofpeach.com Peach

    I adore that you captured this memory. The details, the feeling, the love. I imagine it is a warm place you can return to, should you ever feel cold. Thanks for sharing it.

    • Shannon

      Thanks for reading it!

  • http://hellofisher.com Steve Fisher

    Pretty sure Shannon didn’t mean for this post to coincide with Remembrance Day. She was rushed to get up some posts prior to leaving for a week.

    • Shannon

      I really didn’t. Brain fart.

  • katie

    This post warmed my heart, just heard these are all from your archives for the next while: you’re doing so awesome on NaPoBloMo (or whatever that acronym is…I’ve got another 19 days to get it straight!!). Glad to have found you in my random column this weekend :) Was starting to miss you! Hope you are well.

    • http://splatospheric.blogspot.com MizYank

      I’m with Katiclops–was missing you! I’d have been happy to see a one-liner. This was just beautiful. Funny, sweet, well-written and relatable. Ya can’t ask for anything more from a post.

    • Shannon

      Random column? I think I missed something.

      Thanks for your kind words. This was fun to remember.

  • http://uluwale.wordpress.com malia

    hilarious! thanks for sharing! that was a good laugh. :)

    • Shannon

      I have a friends who cleans her husband’s glasses every morning. I should do the opposite, I think.

  • Christine Linton

    LOL reading this reminds me so much of my husband and I minus the glasses. Boobs are always a great distraction. Mike will attack me on the bed with peck like kisses that we call kissy attack followed by schmoogaing to see who get who’s clothes off first. With kids now those days seem far and between but is still fun when we get a chance. Thanks for laugh and letting me know that we aren’t the only crazy ones!

  • JessLHutton

    Oh my gosh this is me and my husband. Thank God – I was afraid we weren’t normal. ;)